Blessed are the Peacemakers

11/11/2018

Life would be better if we chose to...

I want to focus on one of the Beatitudes this morning, not just because it ties in with Armistice Day, but because it’s at the heart of the Gospel.

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.” Matthew 5:9


In this world, there are different kinds of people.

In the context of this sermon, I’m going to consider four kinds of people.

Firstly, there are the troublemakers. Some people go out deliberately looking for a fight, or a war, or even just an argument. These people like to “stir things up” to provoke conflict.

Football hooligans are one example of troublemakers – many of their “firms”, as they are called, are highly organised.

In our journey through proverbs, we found some troublemakers:

An angry person stirs up conflict, and a hot-tempered person commits many sins.

A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.

Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs.

Secondly, there are what I call the “troublekeepers”. I made up this word! These people don’t deliberately make trouble, but they are quite happy for it to continue. For example, some people involved in a war have a vested interest in it being prolonged, so they can enjoy status and power in the faction that they belong to.

Much of the media are troublekeepers. The media feeds off conflict. Journalists don’t deliberately set out to break up a celebrity marriage, but they make money from reporting every detail of long and bitter divorce proceedings. I saw a Jamie Oliver program where he told the story of a journalist calling him up wondering was he hitting his wife Jools!

Thirdly, there are the peacekeepers. And most of us probably fall into this category. We don’t like conflict and so we try to “keep the peace”. Being a peacekeeper is better than being a troublekeeper, but it doesn’t deal with the underlying cause of a conflict. A peacekeeper is primarily concerned with outward appearances. As long as everything is ok on the surface, a peacekeeper is content.

For years, Irish soldiers have served in the Lebanon as UN peacekeepers. They played an important role, but the underlying resentments were never dealt with and they keep resurfacing, such as in the 2006 war between Israel and Hezbollah, in which over a thousand people died.

Sadly, many marriages are being maintained by ‘peacekeeping’. Everything might look fine on the outside in public, but serious issues exist behind closed doors that are not dealt with, and that express themselves in resentment and disharmony.

The “not the nail video” is a funny example of one person not wanting to deal with an issue!

Fourthly, there are the peacemakers. Peacemakers don’t sweep problems under the carpet – they confront them, even if the process is painful. Peacemakers actively seek to resolve conflict, not just keep it under control. Peacemakers are rare, because peacemaking is hard work. I found it hard to find a picture of peacemakers! Here's one of a young peacemakers club in Kenya:

There is a big difference between peacekeepers and peacemakers. Let me show you a couple of pictures of peacekeepers:

Peacekeepers are intimidating. Their message is: “If you will not keep the peace, you will be punished”. Peacekeepers carry weapons to back up their threats. In military conflicts, the weapons are guns, missiles and sanctions. In family conflicts, the weapons are violence, emotional withdrawal, financial deprivation and separation/divorce.

In contrast, peacemakers are not threatening. They don’t issue ultimatums. They don’t give commands. Peacemakers first and foremost listen. Peacemakers take the time to hear a person’s grievance and understand things from their perspective. Peacemakers are patient – they understand when someone needs time to work through an issue. Peacemakers are in it for the long haul.

It’s interesting to look at the Northern Ireland situation and the various attempts to bring peace. In 1969, British Army soldiers were brought in as peacekeepers. In the early 1970’s, peace walls began to emerge. The stated purpose of the barriers was to minimize sectarian violence between Protestants and Catholics. They are made of iron, brick and steel, sometimes up to 25 feet high. There are currently more than 60 such interface barriers across Northern Ireland, which are managed by the Department of Justice and the Housing Executive. Many of the peace walls are a legacy of the Troubles, but several more have been erected during the last 20 years of relative peace. In fact, there are now more peace walls across Northern Ireland than there were before the signing of the 1998 Good Friday Agreement.

These walls were clearly designed to keep peace, not make it. Peacekeeping troops and peace walls are visible attempts to bring peace but they only serve to contain a conflict; they can never resolve it. On the other hand, the real peacemakers in Northern Ireland tended to work behind the scenes. They kept a low profile, talking to both sides, seeking to understand the different perspectives. Gordon Wilson, whose daughter was killed in the 1987 Eniskillen Remembrance Day IRA bomb was an example of a peacemaker. Hours after the bombing in an emotional TV interview, he forgave the killers saying: "I bear no ill will. I bear no grudge". Peacemaking is difficult and costly. He went on to have meetings with Sinn Féin, with the IRA, and with loyalist paramilitaries in an attempt to persuade them to abandon violence.

The Rev. Cecil Kerr founded the Renewal Centre in Rostrevor. I had the privilege of staying in that centre many times. It was a peacemaking initiative. Its focus was on prayer and reconciliation.

The integrated schools in Northern Ireland are also examples of peacemaking. While peace walls are designed to keep Protestants and Catholics apart, integrated schools are designed to help them grow up together. Sadly, they haven't become mainstream.

Peacemaking in not always popular. In the 1980’s, the Rev. Ken Newell and Fr. Gerry Reynolds set up a bible study group between a large Belfast Presbyterian Church and Clonard Roman Catholic Monastery. It was intended as a response to the Troubles, to foster understanding and dialogue between the Christian traditions, but it caused uproar from middle class churchgoers who preferred troublekeeping and peacekeeping to peacemaking.

In the Methodist church, as you know, ministers are stationed around the circuits. If a major conflict arises between a minister and a congregation, the solution has often been to simply move the minister. This is a peacekeeping exercise. If the underlying problem was a congregation with impossible expectations, then they would be likely to put the same pressure on the next minister. On the other hand, if the underlying problem was a minister who was a control freak, then, more than likely, that minister would do the same to his or her next congregation. Unless the root causes are dealt with through peacemaking, everybody loses and history repeats itself.  

I remember watching an episode of Supernanny where one of the sons in a family of six used to fight with his older sister. The parents controlled this behaviour by shouting at him and threatening him. Supernanny sat him down with his parents and discovered that the reason for his behaviour was that he felt his father had no time for him. And it was true. His father had plenty of time to go to football matches with his mates, but he never brought his son. When the father changed his behaviour, and started doing things with his son, his son’s attitude towards his sister changed. Peacemaking is hard work, but it gets real results. So the question for each one of us, not only in church life, but in the whole of life, is what is our default response to conflict? If we’re honest, I think perhaps we would put ourselves closer to “peacekeeping” than “peacemaking”.

There is a clear Gospel perspective to this business of Peacemaking. We see this firstly in Romans 5:1

‘Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ’ (Romans 5:1) That’s the essence of the gospel.

But then in 2 Corinthians 5, we see a bigger picture of what God is doing with the whole world, and we see that we have a role to play:

‘God reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ…And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. ’

And so we can draw out a few key truths. Firstly, Jesus was a peacemaker while on earth. We see this in is ministry; He didn’t shy away from conflict - He dealt with issues by offering kingdom solutions. It is much easier in the short term to carry on being peacekeepers, but Jesus didn’t promise us an easy life. Thankfully we’re not on our own. God is a peacemaker, and He is on the side of the peacemakers. “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.”

Secondly, Jesus is still peacemaking since His ascension into Heaven. Since the Fall, all creation (including sinful humanity) is out of kilter with a Holy God. However, the Bible tells us that through Jesus, God has started a process of peacemaking on a global scale. Through Jesus, God is reconciling Himself to His creation.

Thirdly, by faith, through grace, we have been reconciled to God through Christ – we have peace with God – that’s our salvation, that’s the Gospel.

And Fourthly, we’ve been saved for a purpose. We have been given the message of reconciliation and the ministry of reconciliation. The message is that peace with God is possible through Jesus. Your job is not only to communicate this to others but also to demonstrate it – to live it out. And if you are to truly live out this ministry of reconciliation, it will mean making a journey from peacekeeping to peacemaking. May God bless us all and strengthen us all as we seek to make this journey. 

Let’s Pray: Father we thank you for your Word that comforts us, inspires us and challenges us. As we consider the challenge to a ministry of reconciliation, we repent of the fact that it is our nature to take the easy option of preserving peace rather than facing up to real issues.

We feel inadequate, and so we need more of your grace to have the courage and the sensitivity to live out this calling to be peacemakers. Father we thank you that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us, reconciling us to yourself, making peace through His blood shed on the cross. We thank you that we can know the joy of true peace and fellowship with you. Help us to share this wonderful news with others, for we pray in Jesus name. Amen.

The wife of noble character (Proverbs 31)

04/11/2018

The saying goes: “Behind every great man there’s a great woman”

According to one website, this phrase was adopted as a slogan for the 1960/70s feminist movement, first having been used in the 1940s. It is less used in more recent years as the imagery of women being behind men is open to misinterpretation.That’s one way of putting it!

Proverbs is written by a Father to a son and it’s full of warnings about bad women.  It’s only when you get to the end that you find a woman described by the various translations as a wife of noble character, a virtuous and capable wife, a wife with a strong character, a valiant woman.

Proverbs 31 is an oracle that King Lemuel’s mother taught him.  We don’t know who King Lemuel is but some scholars believe it’s another name for Solomon which would make the original author Bathsheba. The section on the good wife from verse 10 is an acrostic poem: each line begins with successive letters of the Hebrew alphabet.  This was often done to make it easier to learn. 

At first reading, it looks like we have a very industrious wife who does everything round the house in addition to running the family business, so her husband can sit around chatting with his mates until dinnertime.  However, let’s not forget that it’s all about a good wife – she is the focus.  If you wrote a poem all about a good husband, you’d probably find a passing reference to “her indoors” in amongst a whole list of activities that the good husband is involved in. So let’s not go too hard on the husband – he actually gets some good PR out of this passage, as we’ll see later.

After reading this through, you might find yourself disheartened. If you’re a woman, you might feel that you will never live up to this description – you’ll never be good enough! 

If you’re a man, you might feel that you’ll never find a woman like this!  The good news for all of us is that this woman doesn’t exist! As my study bible points out: “All the ideals set forth here will probably not be fulfilled by any one wife and mother”. 

As I read through this description a few times, it actually reminded me of an obituary, or possibly a speech by a husband at a 50^th wedding anniversary.  It glosses over all the inadequacies and paints a picture of perfection – which of course isn’t the whole story because nobody’s perfect.  Even a wife of noble character will have her bad days and annoying habits but these are omitted in this poem. So you shouldn’t get too disheartened by this description, whether you’re a woman trying to live up to this impossible standard, or a husband wondering why you didn’t marry Miss Perfect. 

In the film “Good will hunting”, Robin Williams talks to Matt Damon about a woman he’s interested in and he says to him: “It is not about whether she’s perfect, nobody is, but what you have to figure out is whether she’s perfect for you.”

So that’s some background; nobody’s perfect, but we can learn some important principles from this description of the good wife.

Firstly, she is valued and affirmed by her husband & children: Verse 11 – “Her husband has full confidence in her”, Verses 28/29 – “Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her; ‘Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.’”

For the husbands here, do you affirm your wife daily?  Do you tell your wife how much you love and appreciate her?  Affirmation is one of the reasons why this woman is so successful. Verse 25 - “She is clothed with strength and dignity.” Affirmation gives her dignity. Just before I got married, a couple of older men met with me and one piece of advice they gave me was that women respond to what they hear. Words matter. I’m sure you’re wondering what else those men advised me to do!

Secondly, she is devoted to her family (prepares food, makes clothes, teaches her children, she brings her husband good, not harm, all the days of her life). The feeling we get here is that this devotion is not out of a sense of duty but out of love and enthusiasm. There’s a lesson for parents here. In the midst of the physical and emotional energy we expend on raising children, we forget that they are a gift from God and to be cherished. 

Thirdly, she is devoted to God. She doesn’t rely on charm or beauty to be successful because she knows that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” (verse 30). Throughout the whole book of Proverbs, the recurring theme is that the key to a successful life is a healthy reverence and respect for the Lord.

Fourthly, she is compassionate. She doesn’t just think of herself and her family. Verse 20 - “She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.”

Fifthly, she uses her time creatively and constructively. Verse 27 – “She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” She manages things well and thinks ahead.

Sixthly, she’s not a worrier!  Verse 25 says: “she can laugh at the days to come.”. Why? Because she plans for the future, she trusts her husband and she trusts God. Despite Jesus’ command not to worry about food or clothes or what tomorrow will bring, some Christians are always worrying about something! Worry is a sign of lack of trust and it destroys your peace. But not this woman! Instead of worrying about the future, she laughs at it!

Seventhly (& finally because seven is the perfect number and this is the perfect wife!), she is content. Verse 15 (gets up early, not drags herself out of bed), Verse 17 (she works vigorously, not begrudgingly), Verse 13 (she works eagerly, not despondently). In some ways, she has every reason to be resentful – up early, busy all day, no time for herself.  But she is happy!  Why is she so content?

Because she is FREE!

Let me explain.  The more I looked at this passage, the more I kept getting the word FREEDOM. 

The mood in this passage is one of harmony in the household. And the chapter taken as a whole is about harmony in society. And the source of this harmony is FREEDOM.

Think about it.  If the king can avoid women and wine, then he has the FREEDOM to govern wisely and the people can then enjoy FREEDOM from oppression and exploitation and society is in harmony. 

In the particular family we’ve been looking at, the husband has the FREEDOM to sit on the local council with the elders. Who gave him that freedom?  The wife did. She has every right to keep him at home or tell him to work all the hours to put food on the table, but she gives him the FREEDOM to use his gifts for the benefit of the community.

Here we have a wife who has the FREEDOM to manage the household as she sees fit.  Her husband is not controlling or domineering or giving instructions – he has “full confidence in her”. She has the FREEDOM to play fast and loose with the joint cheque book. She buys fields and plants vineyards on them!

She has the FREEDOM  to employ servants.  The husband could have said: “We’re not going to waste money paying people to do things that are your responsibility”.  But he gives her the FREEDOM to take on staff, so that she can spend time on her home business. She is gifted in working with materials and she has the FREEDOM to use her gifts for the good of the household.

(Verse 25) “She laughs at the days to come”. This woman has FREEDOM from worry.  She is not afraid of poverty, or cold or enemy attack because she lives in a family and a society where FREEDOM is cherished.

I’m not making a judgement about “a woman’s place being in the home”. This is a family in harmony where each person is given the FREEDOM to use their gifts for the good of the family and the community.  FREEDOM leads to contentment.  The opposite of FREEDOM is CONTROL and it leads to resentment.

There’s a message here for families. Husbands and wives can engage in a power struggle of control and guilt trips and manipulation and keeping records of wrongs causing disharmony and resentment. Parents can try to influence their children in an unhealthy way, especially when it comes to college and careers.  In the film “The dead poet’s society”, one of the boys wants to be an actor and is very good at it, but his father is not impressed and insists that he is going to be a doctor. In the end, the boy shoots himself with his father’s revolver. The consequences of excessive CONTROL can be devastating.

There’s a message here for churches. As a minister, I have to be careful that I don’t pressurise people into doing the jobs that I want them to do. I have to give people the FREEDOM to exercise their gifts in the way God intended them to be used.

And as a congregation, you have to be careful not to try and shape me into the minister that you want me to be. You have to give me the FREEDOM to be myself and to exercise my gifts in the way that God has called me to use them.

Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father, we thank you for your Word, which speaks to so many aspects of life. We thank you for this insight into family life, that You need to be placed at the centre.  We thank you it was for FREEDOM that Christ has set us free, that through the cross, we have freedom from sin and guilt.  And as we receive that FREEDOM, help us to set others free.  Forgive us when we seek to control and dominate and manipulate, thinking that we know best.  Help us to trust other people and to allow them to exercise their God given gifts and abilities for your glory.  For we pray in Jesus name.  Amen.